Simpsons Porn Story: Call of the Simpsonsyet again Chapter 2
Chapter 2:
Welcome to Indian Rock
Its
been an hour since the Simpson family was on the road, and some of
them are losing it. Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we
there yet? Bart repeated a hundred times. NO!!!!! shouted
Homer, Marge, and Lisa. I was just asking. I cant help being so
impatient. Lisa how long from now will we get to this rock
place? Another hour, Lisa stated. But its just been
an hour already, Bart complained. Come to think of it, we
should have been there by now, Lisa replied. Homer, I think
weve been driving in circles, Marge said. Dont be silly
Marge, as man of the house, he never gets lost, Homer replies.
Dad we passed that oak tree with the face three times, Lisa
claimed. Bart added, Dont forget the bush that looks like Patty
LaBelle. Marge said to Homer, Homer, why dont admit that
were lost? We could just ask for directions. The man of the
house doesnt need directions! He can do anything, Homer said
with pride.
Bart
mutters to Lisa, You call passing out when trying to reach down to
the remote is he can do anything? Why you little Homer
said. Homer reached over to Bart, and start strangling him. Homer,
the wheel! Marge yelled. Homer gasped Ah! Homer starts
turning the steering wheel, which caused the car to go through some
woods. LOOK OUT! yelled Marge, Lisa, and Bart. Homer kept
dodging trees as they drove into the woods. As he was, the car was
coming up to a cliff. CLIFF!!! shouted the whole Simpson
family.
Stop
the car Homer! Bart shouted. Homer replied to Bart, I cant!
The dumb dogs chew toy is under the stop the car thingy! The
toy would squeak as Homer tried to hit the brakes. As the car was 10
ft. away from the rim, Homer said to Marge Goodbye Marge, well
just have to do our vacation in heaven. I heard its more romantic
up there. Marge replied, Oh, just kiss me you big lug! Marge
and Homer then kissed their last kiss. As the car rode over the cliff
the whole family screamed and the cat and dog hid under the backseat
AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! Then a second later, the car landed
with a huge thud.
Wha?
Homer said very confused. Everyone in the car turned their heads
around, and saw that the cliff was only 3 ft. fall. They saw a ranger
next to the small cliff with some people taking pictures of it, See
Americas smallest natural cliff. Only a 3 ft. fall, also known as
the entrance of Indian Rock. The family saw a sign that says,
Welcome to Indian Rock Homie, we made it! Marge said
relieved. Homer said in pride Yep. And also may I remind you that
this time, we made it without a problem. Uh oh. Santas
Little Helper peed on the back seat, said Lisa. Doh!
As
the family got out of the car, they saw the stunning wilderness
landscape, and admired it. It even seemed Homer admired the beauty of
Mother Nature too. He said admirably Wow, the International House
of Pancakes. He was staring at an IHOP somewhere in the landscape.
The Simpsons walked
toward a reservation booth. The person in the booth was a Native
American. Welcome Simpson Family. The whole family gasped. How
did you know us? asked Lisa. I saw you on the headline on the
Springfield Shopper. The headline on the newspaper said Oafish
Man Tried to Fire at Endangered Bird. There was a photo of
Homer getting arrested with the bird on his head pecking at him, with
his family in the background looking embarrassed, except Bart who was
smiling. It looked like a chicken, Homer said pathetically.
Did you make a reservation at Indian Rock? he asked. Homer
replied Ya. The Native American looked at his computer at the
booth searching for Simpson, Okay. Staying for two weeks, at
campsite 1A, at Drunken Weasel Campgrounds The whole family looked
at Homer. I was the best I could afford, Homer said sheepishly.
Oh, Im sorry. I should introduce myself, said the Native
American, My name is One Who Runs Around Trees Twenty Times, Hops
on Rabbits and Squirrels, Climbs Up Mountain Full of Mountain Lions
and Grizzly Bears, Howls and Bites With Coyotes, Digs Tunnels to Find
the Lost Moleman Lair, and Leaps Over Canyon Without Falling, said
the Native American, But you can call me George. Hi George!
said the Simpson family. Here a map of the campsites and a golf
car to drive around the campsite, said George, And keep your
pets leased at all times. Theres only one trail theyre allowed
to be on. Oh, and any of you dont think about going in the
fire pit!. Aww! moaned Homer and Bart.
After
George giving the Simpson Family the stuff, a bald eagle mysteriously
swooped down at Georges shoulder. The family awed in amazement,
Bart asked Is that your pet eagle? Yes it is, George
replied, Thank you for bringing my dry cleaning Pepsi. Heres
your reward. George reached a live weasel from his pocket. He
tossed it towards the eagle and it swallowed it whole. The family
stared at George strangely. What? he asked.
The
family loaded their luggage and the pets on to the golf car and drove
to their campsite. Homer weve been driving for 15 minutes now,
and dont tell us were not lost because we are, Marge said.
Oh, Marge. You just have to learn that Im the genius, and
youre the simple-minded one. Lisa suddenly spoke up Dad,
Dad, youre driving on somebodys campsite!
Ah!
Here
we go again, muttered Bart.
As
soon as the family on the campsite saw the car, they dashed out of
the cars way, letting it run over everything, completely
destroying the campsite. Homer was having a hard a time steering,
seeing that the car was going REALLY fast and was trying dodging
objects on peoples campsites (tents, grills, etc.)Homer! Get
back on the road! Marge said yelling at Homer. I cant!
Homer frighteningly replied, But dont worry, I have a plan!
Homer
hesitated for a couple of seconds, until the family found themselves
in the woods again. SAVE ME JEBUS! screamed Homer. Then out of
the blue, the car hit a tree. Everyones air bags blew up, except
Homers causing him to hit the dash board. (Note: All of you would
be dead, right? Well, surprisingly youre wrong. As you see in the
cartoon world, they dont believe in The Law of Physics. Go
figure. So Homer didnt actuality go through the dashboard window.
Instead he hit his head on the wheel only causing a bump. My
mistake.) Finally after a couple of seconds, Homers air bags blew
up hard, practically smothering Homer. DOH!
Homer,
are you all right! Marge asked worriedly. Homer finally woke up
and said, Fine? Im not fine. Im great! Hey Marge, when did
you have blue spots all over your body? Suddenly Bart slapped his
dads face, Wake up Homer! Astonishingly Homer regained
consciousness. Then raised his arms and yelled WHY YOU LITTLE!
and starts strangling Bart, Ill teach you to help me regain
consciousness!